Emotional influence and growth: Therapy techniques for children

Parenting is a journey filled with emotional highs and lows, but one of the most powerful tools parents have is their authenticity. As a licensed professional counselor Michelle Wayman explained during her guest appearance on parenting podcast “Parenting Issues Show”, children thrive when their caregivers demonstrate emotional congruence - aligning their feelings, words, and actions. This approach doesn’t just build trust; it lays the groundwork for emotional intelligence.

Why emotional authenticity matters

Children are remarkably intuitive. They pick up on discrepancies between what parents say and what they feel. “If a parent is frustrated but trying to pretend everything is fine, children sense the mismatch,” Michelle noted. This incongruence can create confusion or even feelings of unsafety in a child. By contrast, when parents openly acknowledge their emotions saying something like, "I’m feeling a little overwhelmed, so I’m going to take a deep breath" - it models healthy emotional regulation.

The role of emotional regulation in parenting

Michelle emphasized that parents are their child’s first emotional regulators. “Rocking a crying baby is one of the earliest examples of co-regulation,” she shared. This early dynamic evolves as children grow, but the principle remains the same: how parents manage their emotions significantly influences how their children learn to navigate their own feelings. Studies confirm that children with emotionally attuned caregivers develop stronger coping mechanisms and are better equipped to handle stress.

Practical tips for applying authenticity at home

Parents often feel the pressure to stay calm and composed, but trying to mask emotions can backfire. Instead, Michelle recommended these strategies:

• 1. Check in with yourself
     Before reacting to your child, take a moment to assess your emotions. Acknowledging feelings like frustration or exhaustion out loud - not in anger but with honesty - teaches children that all emotions are valid and manageable.
• 2. Model self-regulation
     Use moments of frustration as opportunities to demonstrate calming techniques. For example, verbalizing, "I’m going to count to five to help myself calm down," not only diffuses tension but also provides your child with a coping tool they can mimic.
• 3. Create a safe space for emotions
     Foster an environment where both you and your child feel comfortable expressing emotions without judgment. This openness builds trust and encourages emotional resilience.

Beyond emotions: The power of play

In her work as a Synergetic Play Therapist, Michelle uses play to help children process emotions. She explained that play therapy isn’t just about fun; it’s a medium through which children can explore and understand their inner world. Parents can adapt this at home by engaging in activities that allow their kids to express themselves freely, whether through games, art, or storytelling. These interactions deepen connections and reinforce the emotional safety children need to thrive.

"The most impactful lessons we teach our children come from how we live and respond, not just what we say" – Michelle Wayman

Conclusion

Parenting authentically isn’t about striving for perfection; it’s about showing up as your genuine self and teaching your child to embrace their emotions through your example. By openly acknowledging your feelings, modeling self-regulation, and creating an emotionally safe space, you empower your child with lifelong tools for resilience and emotional intelligence.