Understanding kids' emotions: Strategies to support them through fear
Parenting Issues by Levelty
Helping children navigate their emotions, especially fear, is essential for fostering resilience and confidence. This article explores insights shared by Stephanie Schurkens, a Licensed Associate Counselor and specialist in child and teen anxiety, on the Parenting Issues Show. It highlights why kids experience fear, practical strategies for parents to support them, and the long-term benefits of facing fears. By implementing gradual exposure, modeling healthy coping mechanisms, and validating emotions, parents can transform anxiety into an opportunity for growth.
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January 28, 2025
In a recent episode of the Parenting Issues Show, one of the most pressing topics for parents was discussed: helping kids overcome their fears. The guest, Stephanie Schurkens, a Licensed Associate Counselor and specialist in child and teen anxiety, shared valuable insights and strategies. Here, we’ve compiled the key takeaways to help parents better understand and support their children in challenging moments.
Why kids experience fear
Fear in children arises from both real-life events and imagined scenarios. It’s important for parents to recognize that fear, while overwhelming, is not inherently negative. Every time a child faces and overcomes fear, they build emotional resilience. Like a muscle that grows stronger with use, their confidence increases with every success. Parents play a crucial role in creating an environment where kids feel supported as they navigate their fears.
Practical strategies for supporting kids
Gradual exposure
One highly effective way to address kids' emotions and fears is through gradual exposure. For example, if a child is afraid of public speaking, start small with low-pressure situations, like speaking one-on-one, and gradually increase the audience size. Celebrate each small victory, as every step forward matters.
Modeling healthy coping mechanisms
Another key strategy is modeling healthy coping mechanisms. Children learn by observing their parents. When parents demonstrate calm problem-solving or use techniques like deep breathing during stressful moments, they provide a powerful example for their kids to emulate.
Validation
Validation is equally important. When a child expresses fear, dismissing it with phrases like “Don’t be scared” can make them feel unheard. Instead, acknowledge their emotions with statements like, “I see you’re feeling scared, and that’s okay.” This reassures them that their feelings are valid while also shifting the focus to solutions, fostering trust and confidence.
The long-term benefits
When kids successfully face their fears, they develop self-efficacy—the belief in their ability to overcome challenges. This not only reduces anxiety in the short term but also builds the foundation for lifelong confidence, resilience, and problem-solving skills. Parents can further nurture this growth by encouraging practices like mindfulness, gratitude, or journaling. Additionally, activities that involve play and problem-solving, such as puzzles or team sports, help kids manage frustration and celebrate accomplishments.
By prioritizing strategies that build resilience, parents can help their children face fears with courage and turn anxiety into triumph. For more guidance and resources on supporting kids' emotions, visit Stephanie's website.